Life comes at you fast, and sometimes, you are caught up in its waves as it sweeps past. Happiness is the hope of survival on which you place your heart, but what happens when you’re not happy? You gradually lose your reason for existence, and you become everything you’ve always hated. A lot of people are not satisfied with their lives, and their real problem lies in the fact that they don’t know the reason why they are unhappy.
Below, I will share five reasons why you are unhappy, and I believe when you read them, you’ll know the next steps to take.
- Background and expectations. “Geography is destiny” is a famous quote that reinforces the importance of background and origin in people’s lives. There’s a considerable chance that your roots and geography already determine your future. If you’re born in a remote village, your chances of getting proper education are remotely poor, while living in an urban area increases your chances. Your background includes your family morals and methods of parenting you experienced. If you come from a home of lies, pretense and fear, you’ll most likely end up an unhappy person. Family expectations also play a significant role in your life. What you’re expected to be might be different from what you want to become or what you have become. Look within yourself and ask these questions. “Am I a reflection of my background? “Do I meet people’s expectations of me? “Letting people decide what life you should live opens you up for doom. You must take control of your life and change your background if you have to.
- Insatiable wants and needs. Man is never satisfied with anything he has, and this can be a big problem. Are you always on the hunt for more? Do you get disappointed when you don’t get what you want? These questions are thoughts you must examine at all times. Stop chasing that thing, which doesn’t add value to your life. Disappointments come from expectations, and expectations come from wanting more. It’s normal to want the best, but it becomes toxic when you start getting desperate about it. Whatever you can afford is what you should get.
- The Upper Limit Problem (ULP). This is one very important aspect of happiness. It is when your brain believes that your happiness doesn’t deserve to reach its peak, so it should be limited. The ULP is a widespread problem that affects almost everyone without them knowing about it. Do you wonder why you start thinking of bad things moments after you experience a good thing? Maybe you get a notification of a job that’s 500 kilometres away from you. I can assure you that minutes after getting that notification, your mind automatically feeds you bad information like having an accident on your way to work. The ULP comes around because you have programmed your mind to believe that you don’t deserve the best. Try to evaluate your life in recent times. Whenever you receive good news or pull off a good job, and you’re very excited, evil thoughts automatically enter your head in seconds, and you try to tone down your happiness. The ULP is evident in the life of many people, but fortunately, it’s avoidable. The best cure for ULP is knowing and acknowledging its existence. When you fully understand what ULP is, you’ll be more conscious, and you can sustain your happiness.
- You are getting worried over things you have no control of. Worry is a huge problem in the lives of so many people. What’s worse is that a lot of people worry a lot about things they have no control over. Worrying is a natural state of mind that helps people evaluate their current position and know how much help they need. The negative side of worrying comes around when you are agitated about things your worry won’t change. As long as you can’t fix it then or in the nearest future, take your mind off whatever it is and focus on the next step instead. If you can’t do anything to turn the situation around, then you do not need to worry about it because worrying creates unhappiness in the mind and heart.
- Wrong choices. No one is too big or smart to make wrong choices. What makes an intelligent person is knowing how to turn the situation around for good. Unhappiness will set up a tent in your life when you have the wrong job, wrong relationships, wrong conversations, wrong guesses, wrong assumptions, wrong determination, etc. There’s a limit to how well you can tolerate someone/something you don’t like. If you’ve made wrong choices already, do not panic. Examine your current position and see what happens when you try to leave that place that makes you unhappy. If it’s too dangerous, you have to plan other ways, but if it’s not, get out of it as soon as possible while you still can.
Life’s wrong choices can break the toughest of strength, and the wittiest intelligence. Happiness gives life a radiant look that makes it feel good to be alive. Please do not lose your happiness for anything, because once it’s lost, it’s tough to regain.
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